Unicorn

So, the other day at work, it dawned on me that I am the only one of the 6 managers in my store to not be married or living with a significant other. This is not a new situation for me. I continually find myself on the outside looking in. Sometimes, I romanticize it and liken myself to the lone unicorn watching all the other animals boarding the ark two by two fretting that if I don't cut the horn off of my head (and drown that bitch horse sniffing around Mr. Ed) that I'll not make it onboard the ark and instead will drown in the flood (of my sorrow). Alone.

And sometimes its not that serious. But it does bug me. And makes me wonder what is, to continue my metaphor, the horn that I need to remove that will make me compatible to a partner? Am I too tall, too blonde, too fat, too gay, too ugly, too smart, too insecure, too boring, too much of a smoker, too lonely? and the newest option: am i too old?

One of my closest friends found his first true love in a guy named Danny when he was 26. I started dating a Daniel when I was 26, and thought it was divine providence. After we broke up, I dated another Daniel when I was 27. No such luck. And even Willie who I really started to care for at 28 moved away to the other side of the country.

My mother turned down her first marriage proposal at 25, and accepted the next one at 27.

My 10 year high school reunion just came up, and none of the girls I was friends with were there because they were at home with their husbands and children.

And since this blog started as a riff on Miss Spears, consider the fact that at 24 she is pregnant with her third baby by the man who just might turn out to be her third husband. Is she that much more of a catch that dudes are beating down her door to stick it in her? And here I thought I was better off than Britney!!!